Poly As I Know It

So I had a long post written about the intricacies of poly as N and I want, and just deleted it all for this more concise point:

If three or more people agree to live if in an arrangement they all consent to, what business is it of anyone else to question, disparage or mock?

Whatzit Tooya?

In a thread I was on FL, we had this exact thing going on. Some troll feels that because the poly community (according to him) is 90% mentally damaged people, poly is basically a man having his cake and eating someone else’s too. He’s claimed that the men who say their s-types are required to stay monogamous to them are dickless wonders, unable to keep it in their pants nor tolerate the possible slight to their ego if their partner wanted another man.

And the women in this scenario are damaged broads with an inability to say no, who would do anything including feigning bisexuality and asking for emotional masochism to keep their “man”.

I don’t dispute that scenario. What I do dispute is that this behavior is relegated to the kink community. I’ve seen numerous vanilla couples doing the same, and I don’t my new troll-friend calling out the vanilla community for not recognizing how stupid they are.

Hasn't he ever watched an episode of "I fell in love with your sister!" ?

He also wouldn’t accept that there are women who can commit to being monogamous to a poly partner while being mentally stable and happy. These people don’t exist in his world, I guess.

Triangle relationships like the one N and I desire don’t fit into the troll’s equation, so he writes them off as minimal and conveniently bypasses them.

Unless we start requiring competency tests to allow people to engage in any kink, I think it is disingenuous to claim that poly shouldn’t be practiced because only mentally damaged people are doing it to fill a blighted hole in their pysche. If we start claiming that, we might as well bar people from doing S&M of any sort, because lots of people do so for less than stellar mental health reasons. Also, let’s get rid of religion, because many people use it to fill their voids and twist it to fuel and justify their irrational behavior. Fuck, get rid of politics too.

Poster child for mental illness being an allowable platform to run from.

Or we can just accept that people have a right to consent to whatever they want (barring a certifiable grave mental illness) and your objection that everyone in said group of consenting adults doesn’t have the right to do said actions because they aren’t doing it for the right reasons amounts to as much as piss in the wind.

Why is it that the smug monogamous people are the ones that ended up killing most poly threads, anyhow?

One thought on “Poly As I Know It

  1. …….And it harm none, Do what thou wilt. If it works for you, and your not hurting anyone….then every one else can fuck off. Just because someones view of the world can’t fit yours into their pretty little box, doesn’t mean that it is wrong. After all, wright and wrong are constructs we each make up for ourselves.

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